“Just forgive and forget. It’ll be OK.”

There have been countless situations in my life where I have heard that quote, and in most of these situations, I have. However, as I grew up, I contemplated if allowing someone to get away with something scot-free was the best choice. In the “real world” (I’m in high school; the real world doesn’t exist to me yet), I have begun to experience a few situations where I think to myself: “Should I just let this go? This is a pretty big deal.” This reality of me going through life with these rose-colored glasses has slowly been setting in, and now, I see that maybe I shouldn’t have forgiven all the people I did.

It was summer, and my family had just sat down for dinner. My parents had been on the phone for upwards of two hours, upset for most of them. I stayed silent until the next day, not wanting to interrupt a serious conversation. It was on the next morning’s drive to school that I found out a close family member had made a poor decision — a decision that affected a joint business venture between the two families. At first, I was filled with rage, not understanding how this family member could do something like that, with no concern for the relationship between both families. However, as we allowed the situation to progress, my rage slowly dissipated and was replaced with disappointment. 

As I progress throughout life, I realize that not everything has the same consequences as someone accidentally kicking me on the slide. Some situations do deserve a moment of contemplation to understand the true gravity of the problem. This family member made a grave mistake, and while I have forgiven him for the exact situation, I will always hold a wall up when talking to him.  As National Forgiveness Day nears on Sept. 27, I emphasize allowing myself to forgive someone while not ignoring the depth of the circumstance. 

Working toward understanding the reality of society was hard. I wish I was still a little kid who could ignore everything that happened to me and could live in a world covered by a rose-colored lens. I appreciate allowing children to preserve their innocence by telling them to give people a second chance, but as they grow up, we must help people transition into a world of harsh truths and understanding. 

I know my opinion will change as I grow up even more, but right now, I will advocate for more people to understand the truth of society and that it is OK for you to not repeatedly give someone a blank slate.